The Great Westbury “Rooftop Graze” of 2026
In a desperate attempt to achieve “Net Zero” while simultaneously slashing the landscaping budget, the Westbury Town Council has officially retired its fleet of diesel lawnmowers....
The “West End Chasm”: Westbury’s New Subterranean Tourist Trap
In what is being hailed as the most significant geological event in Wiltshire since the discovery of chalk, the town of Westbury is buzzing with excitement...
The Westbury “Infinite Gyration” – The Magic Roundabout 2.0
In a move designed to “harmonize” the arrival of 8,500 new luxury semi-detached homes on the town’s southern edge, the Westbury Town Planning Committee has officially...
The “Great Winged Heckle” of 2026
In what is being described as a “demographic shift of avian proportions,” Westbury has been descended upon by a colony of exceptionally large, remarkably grumpy seagulls....
Westbury Unveils “Patience Park: The A350 Bypass Experience,” Replacing Grassacre Park
In a bold move that effectively monetizes the town’s defining characteristic, the Westbury Town Council has announced a revolutionary new public-private partnership. The beloved (but admittedly...
The M30 “Wiltshire Ring”: Westbury’s Orbital Awakening
In a move that finally puts the “bypass vs. through-road” debate to bed, the Department for Transport has announced that Westbury will become the first town...
The Bitham Brook “Grand Canal” Plot
In a desperate bid to bypass the perennial gridlock of the A350, the Westbury Planning Committee has unveiled its most ambitious project yet: the Bitham Blue-Way....
The Great Soap Box “Safety-Off” of 2026
The Great Soap Box “Safety-Off” of 2026 In a decision that has sent shockwaves through the local artisan plywood community, the Westbury Town Council has officially...
The Great A350 Sentience Crisis
In a development that has surprised absolutely no one who has ever sat stationary for forty minutes near the Warminster Road junction, the traffic lights at...
The Great “Silicon Horse” Pivot of 2026
In a move that has left local historians weeping into their pints at the Horse & Groom, the Westbury Town Council announced this morning that the...